stories, Uncategorized

What doesn’t goes right, goes left.

This was one date which shouldn’t have been. Sitting the cafe, waiting for her, I was feeling lost. “Sheetal Yadav”. Mom had searched one from the clan it seems. Forced meetings in the open public places, sponsored by parents is the latest fad in arrange marriage mentality folks. They been they are being urban and broad-minded by arranging two strangers to meet in a public place.

12:15, no sign of her. Should I ditch her?

Is that her?

Saffron suit, ponytail, creep alert. She looked exactly like the studious topper of high school. The one with lots of oil in the hair, big glasses, full body covered clothing.

She: Hey. Sorry I was late.

The normal introduction started, forced boring formal conversations. I needed to make her realize how bad a guy I was. I had to make sure she hates me and rejects me to her parents. I knew mom wouldn’t consider my no as it should be. It would be taken as a yes in a hard case. They always did that.

I broke conversation into main stream.
Me: See there are things you should know about me. I have had a lot of sex in the past. With many girls. Had this Casanova image, you see.
She: Really? But weren’t you in engineering college?
Me: Yes, but I spent most times in Delhi.
She: Okay. I hope you don’t plan on doing that after marriage.

She had destroyed my first delivery for a sixer! I needed to go in deeper.

Me: No I won’t, of course. Do you think we can smoke in here?
She: Please check no? I can really use a smoke.

The girl smokes! This is the moment you realize your bomb went off in your own pocket.
I wasn’t willing to give up.

Me: Well I don’t smoke nicotine and shit. I smoke up, you know. Weed and all. 420.
She: Ohh really! You do that often?
Me: Yeah everyday. And I do the chemicals too. Coke, meth, shrooms.
She: I have never even heard of these. Weed I knew. Rest seem scary.
Me: I liked the high they give. But they can be a bad influence. Decide well about me.
She: Are you kidding? I used to snort crushed Disprin tablets to get high in college just because we couldn’t find any real stuff. And my parents will kill me if I refuse for you. You are by far the tallest, most reputed and financially strongest guy.
Me: I am sure there will be many better than me.
She: Yeah but who does all that stuff? Drugs and all.
Me: Yeah, that’s me! I am so addicted to these things. I might just die before 40.
She: We could use the drugs to get high and have sex at honeymoon. I would love to try all of them with you dear.
Me: Have you done anything at all yet?
She: I drink a lot. Whiskey mostly.

I got my cue. Within five minutes, I got out of the place on context of an incoming call. I then texted her that I had to leave due to personal emergency. she had to sort the bill.

As it turned out, instead of proving her I was wrong, she proved me she was wrong! My parents had no issues rejecting her when they got to know about her drinking and drugs problems.

As they say, what doesn’t goes right, goes left!


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